One of the things that really creeps me out in films is people falling into bed with each other. I don’t mean the way people choose their partners. I mean the way that pure lust isn’t tempered by consent. People kiss each other without establishing a relationship. They fall into bed, often literally, and at no point in any of this do they actually speak. I can’t understand having any kind of sexual contact without first establishing that sexual contact is wanted. I honestly cannot understand it. Even within a relationship where sex has been established as an ongoing possibility, how can you actually proceed without making certain of mutuality at that particular point in time? It doesn’t make sense to me. And that’s usually why I don’t like sex scenes in movies. There’s no conversation. They don’t speak. They just act, and that’s really creepy. Body language, especially with somebody new to you, just isn’t that reliable. And how, with nothing but body language, which is ambiguous, can you know which activities are and are not being consented to? I get the feeling, much of the time, that at some point everybody else got handed a script and I didn’t. So they follow the script, working on the assumption that, if kissing has not been met by scrreaming and fighting, the rest of the script is also consented to. What’s the script? No, really – what’s the script? What is it I’m not getting? Where did the whole range of possibilities get reduced to a single chain of events, and how does anybody know what they are?

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